Category: sports

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too wide

I drew a person with really wide shoulders, so I shaved them down. But it looks weird now. I’m just gonna not draw for the next twelve million years. Side profiles are hard to draw especially when you aren’t looking at any references. I’m not gonna draw anything, especially people.

School is to start in a week. That’s not good. I’m not prepared. Physically, with all supplies, I am. But I don’t really want to go back to school, even though it will leave me with something to do. I mean, either way I can’t stop myself from going there when the time comes.

Tomorrow I have table tennis practice and I don’t feel too well today. I don’t know if I will feel much better tomorrow, so I’ll figure it out tomorrow, when I get there. For now I will draw. Or write something. Until then!

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movable type

I’ve been thinking about a lot of different things these days. I mean there isn’t much to do, but I have lots of random topics floating around my head.

At school, I’m not very good at being consistent towards people. I would act really nice and then after a while, joking, and then really mean and ignoring them. Or completely different from how I was before. I act very different depending on the person. Are all people like this or is this really weird? I’m not really sure. But then again, I’m not really sure of anything.

Anyways, yesterday, I got a haircut. I haven’t had one in about a year or maybe more. It’s not too short, it’s a little below my shoulders, but the front is shorter than the front. By the time I go back to school, it should be longer. It’s also thinner, so I can tie it up without a horsetail weighing my head back. The other time that I had table tennis practice, some person’s mother told me that at my school, many experienced and skilled players have graduated so it is up to the younger grades to uphold our reputation as champions, but last year, the farthest we got was third and my team got fifth. The boys side, I wasn’t too sure of, but it wasn’t very far up either. Hopefully we do better next year. Oh! That means we have to hold try-outs in… is it October or November? I don’t know but I’ll figure it out.

I should go to a tournament to get points and build up experience. But they are so terrifying. I hate seeing strangers and having to play against them. I just get uncomfortable. Last time I went to a tournament, I didn’t wear shorts, so I got yelled/scolded by the creepy old man referee. I was self-conscious that time about really short shorts, but now, I can wear shorts without thinking about them because I have built some self-confidence. I can’t wear skirts and crop tops without feeling slightly disgusted and self-conscious. I’m not comfortable wearing them in public. I have to wear a type of pants. I have the same feeling when I wear swimwear and go into the water. 🙁

Anyway, I have to get relatively early tomorrow, so I’ll end here and go sleep. Goodnight and see you next time!

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blanked out

– [Miss Right] 방탄소년단 –

I just blanked out for a really long time; I just stared at an empty page on the computer without doing anything. I’ve been doing that a lot lately. I’ve done some work, for example my art. I should do some of my math, but, I’m too lazy right now. Maybe I’ll do it later. I also have table tennis practice later. That means I should hurry up and do some work.

It’s almost Father’s Day. I don’t really talk about my family a lot. I’m not even sure if they read my blog, because if they do, I shouldn’t write what I feel about them on a public website like this. Typing is fun, but you know, safety first. I should make a Father’s Day card. Well, I’ll do that instead of my math project, just to feel a little more productive.

See ya!

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(: in a still frame

Tomorrow there are actual things happening. I have P.E. that requires me to enter the water again. I really don’t want to. I really don’t. Aanyway. There is also the Sports Banquet. Semi-formal. Well, that’s new.

My current song is ‘I Smile’ by DAY6, and I really like it for some reason. Maybe because I haven’t smiled in a while, meaningfully. Well, isn’t that depressing. Tomorrow sounds depressing.

I should go now and prepare my stuff for tomorrow. Goodnight!

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hydrophobic

For P.E. tomorrow, we are required to enter the water in order to get a passing mark. However, I am slightly (or VERY) terrified of going into the water. It’s not that I’m self-conscious, I literally don’t like submerging myself in water. Another thing is that I don’t know how to swim and I don’t plan on learning anytime soon. I don’t like this.

Nothing really happens these days; all I’ve been doing nowadays is do a lot of homework, watch things to get my mind off of working, and maybe just listening to music and not doing anything. I should really clean up for the day and prepare for tomorrow, but I don’t like thinking about tomorrow. Why can’t I stay awake for the whole time and still not get tired? So I don’t have to worry about a night, waking up in the morning, and I can spend the whole nighttime doing whatever I want to. And I don’t have to do work, since it’ll be done in the day. Nighttime is my aesthetic. I really like nighttime, despite the fact that you can’t see anything when it’s dark.  Whatever, I’ll write something about darkness later when I have more time.

For now, I shall go, as my mother has advised me. Goodnight!

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accompanied loneliness

–[Lonely] 씨스타–

I am late again. By another day. You know, I try to have at least two posts in one month, but for the past two months, I suck at remembering to write. Well, here we are in June. I really dislike how we are already in our last month of school. There are only 21 more days until school is out. However I still have many things to do. I still have to edit and print my English simile poem. My poem somehow turned depressing. Again. Just like my ‘I am From’ poems. I still have to study for my Socials test for next week, and then there is one more unit to cover. My Science is almost coming to an end. Art is wrapping up, Math is in the last project, and the other classes are just things I don’t exactly focus on, like French, P.E., and Home Ec. I have a skills test tomorrow in Home Ec. Well. I nearly forgot.

I guess I am really lonely, even though there are people around. I mean, if I tell my family or my one really close friend, they’ll go, ‘it’s okay, you still have us.’ But, really, I still have a sense of loneliness. I always look at people’s backs, so if I switch places with them and I can’t see their backs, I feel scared. But when I see their backs, I feel left behind if I don’t catch up. I really don’t get what I want.

There is a Sports Banquet for all the Spring and Summer sports teams. Sometime next week. There is a dress code. I dislike having a restriction even if it is to look semi-formal. I don’t like wearing dresses, so I guess I’ll wear something half casual, but a little more fancy, like some random thing hiding in the back of my closet that is not something I usually wear. If I can find something like that. My friend is worrying about it, but then again, it is our first fancy event since entering high school.

Tomorrow is another day of looking at people’s backs. I guess I should go sleep and get back up in the morning. Well then, goodnight! I mean, see ya!

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whooops

I’ve been planning for the past year to post some creative material, however, I ended up making this into some very vague journal for the world to see. But I do have some incomplete work in my drafts and in my random folder with drawings and writing in them. But I really don’t like posting them out… and they are not even done. Or properly developed.

School is a thing. Yeah. I got my marks for English, Socials, French, and… that’s it. Well, those are most of my Day Two classes. There is lots of work to do. And more work to come; I can’t wait for Spring Break. I need a break. I get to skip Friday because I have to go to the Provincials… It goes all the way until the evening. And there is a second part on Saturday. I’m not complaining.

I have been listening to lots of weird OST. I mean, it depends on the actual series right… If the song reminds me of the series, then I think it works. Idk… I think I have very little interest in anything my friends are interested in. Is that a little too mean? However, it is true. They have aspirations, places they want to be, things they want to do, things they will do, and paths to take. I (not a special snowflake) can’t seem to find anything to do with my future. There are so many possibilities.

Course Selection is almost complete, as the only other thing I need to do is enter it into the system. There are many people that say things like, “It’s easier to change things when you’re younger,” or, “It really determines your path later in life.” It kind of… intimidates me. In a way that makes me really stressed and nervous for no actual reason. Course Selection may not be the reason for that stressed feeling. Perhaps the fact that Term Two is ending and Term Three units are starting. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahgggggggg. I’m going to literally explode. Somehow. I’ll figure it out later. Anyway, will I scream internally, I will organize tomorrow’s materials. Goodnight! :))

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predicament part ii

Why is my brother so cuute! I know he’s like five, but bro, he’s so adorable. I did an English test this morning; it was composed of two parts: a quotes section of who said it, and an essay. I got 23/30 for the quotes side, and my teacher will mark the essay on her own time. I feel like I will failll. I also did a Socials Studies presentation-ish and I guess I did okay with the information part. I also need to complete my course selection form. I did lots of things today, I guess, compared to me usually. I got all my Day 2 teachers to sign my Field Trip form. I have table tennis provincials in 2 weeks. I’m gonna cry, because I missed 2 practices due to snow this week. Last week, I missed it once due to the Science Fair. I’m so out of shape. And out of focus due to my lack of practice. I also suck at staying warmed-up. Should wear more. :))

School has been quite… busy. It is the end of the term. I dislike making things. Like with wood and intense machines. AKA basic Tech Ed stuff. I enjoy drawing/designing stuff, but I’m probably not going to take Drafting next year. Also Enriched courses are something I might take. I don’t really like how it’s called Enriched. Kind of hard to say, and sounds a little pretentious. It’s also really different from Honours, which I dislike, but like who cares. I just want things to be easier and the same. I don’t enjoy change when it directly affects me. Sad. Anyway, I need to get started on writing an article for the school newspaper which is due in 2 days. I.. yeah. See ya. Goodnight!

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a hint of red

It’s almost Chinese New Year! Today, I had table tennis practice. I ran around for various reasons. Some things happened that caused a bit of a commotion. I have surprisingly survived almost 2 terms of high school. Now, I’m starting to wonder, how am I supposed to survive the next 4 years? Wait. How is it 2017 already? 2017 seems like such a large number. It’s been almost an entire month of 2017, and I’m still not used to it. There are so many things to do, yet, I really really don’t want to do any of it.

There is this report for the Science Fair that we have to write; it should be approximately 500 words in total, but I have written about half of the report, and I have reached around 579 words last time I checked. This is great. I don’t think my teacher wants to read all that I have written, so I will use the next week to look it over with my partner and complete, or start, the poster board in the week. My partner doesn’t do much, so I told her to at least to get the poster board, however I started saying that back in December, and now we have a week left to finish this FAIR, and she promises to get it this weekend. Great. I totally don’t feel rushed now. I really want this Science Fair, English Test + Essay, Math Building Project, Tech Ed Project, Art Project, SCHOOL to end. I don’t think I’m going to be able to finish all this with a passing mark. Or a satisfying mark with the amount of time left until all these things are due.

I like my of my teachers. However, there are some that just don’t sit well with me, like I don’t really understand or think that the way they teach is very efficient with a class that I have. Oh crap. I just remembered that for my English and Essay, we have this outline sheet, which I am mostly finished, but I have yet to make notes for the conclusion. See? I’m done with this. Get me outta here. I should sleep soon. Well then, goodnight and see ya later!

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what you will

I have some things to do that are related to school, however, I have typed half a paragraph and I am already sick and bored of it. I just don’t want to do work. Or study. I kind of want to imagine myself doing work, but when I actually get started, I can’t concentrate.

I really dislike thinking about school work, and generally anything that requires a lot of effort. School. UGHHH. Only one thing has made me a little more happy is the fact that I am on the school table tennis B team, almost A, but I highly doubt that I will be in the A team due to the fact that there are older, more experienced players in the current line-up. I should work my way from the bottom to experience the tournaments first. I have practice tomorrow. That means, I should recharge, and then do some more work… more thinking…
Anyway, see ya’ll next time I write!